A Need To Be Heard!

by Paul Castain on April 19, 2012

For those of you Spinal Tap fans out there, you know about the famous amp that can go to “11” . . . I thought this might be a really cool way for you to remember to really and truly HEAR people because . . .

At the core of every human being is a need to be heard in fact, you’ve probably heard me say that . . .

Everyone has a story and wants to be heard!

The sad reality is that many of us aren’t truly listened to and therefore we aren’t truly heard.

You can be the person who listens!

And when you listen, listen without a need to respond as my friend Deepak Chopra says. Actually Deepak isn’t my friend but if he was I think he’d listen without a need to respond. If he did respond, I’d call him out for responding because that would be bullsh*t even still . . .

Don’t allow yourself to “one up” . . . just listen unconditionally but . . .

If it were only that simple!

Sometimes we allow technology to bring us to the land of “multitasking” when we should be giving the other person the gift of our full attention.

Other times we never hear someone’s precious story simply because we never asked!

Are you asking?

Time Out! Think about the people you pass by at work without taking a moment to hear their story! Think about the people in your next meeting who are silent but might have a story. Think about your clients, the receptionist, that neighbor who you’ve only been on “waving terms with”.

Funny thing about each of our stories . . . when they are listened to, it gives us a sense, that if even for a brief moment in time . . . we matter!

And before you go. . .

please know how grateful I am that you’ve stopped by today  . . .

To hear me!


To find out more about my consulting services, corporate training programs or to hire me as your personal coachclick here to send me an email and I’ll be sure to get right back to you!

  • Kristine Allcroft

    Great information!! Although I’m not a fan of Deepak (sorry!) I have a background in psychology – as a therapist! So your words, once again ring true . . . thank you – again!

  • Thanks Kristine . . . I really appreciate that. So should I take back “The Complete Deepak” box set I got you for Christmas?

    Just kidding . . . Have a wonderful weekend!

  • How about a Friday brainstorm on ways to improve listening skills?  I enjoy listening to others but frequently walk away and say “what did they just tell me?”
    I hope everyone has a nice weekend . . .

  • Krista Morris

    So true, yet so infrequently applied to everyday interaction (unfortunately).  When applied to business, there couldn’t be an easier  way to gain a customer’s appreciation and respect.  Great thoughts!

  • CGoodrow

    Nothing is more frustrating than feeling you are going to get “one upped” when you are telling a story. Unless you decide to make it a game and always try to “one up” their “one up”…goodtimes haha

  • Imagining you and Deepak hanging out, watching Spinal Tap – made me smile. Thanks for your good work ~

  • Jabba

    lol…… When having a particularly abrasive time on the phone I would look at Deepaks “This moment is as it should be – Because THE WHOLE UNIVERSE is as it should be”  “I will not try to change THE WHOLE UNIVERSE – by changing this moment.”

  • I am sorry for getting to this comment so late otherwise this would have been an awesome discussion in our Linkedin group.

    Meanwhile, thank you for stopping by and suggesting that!

  • Thank you Krista . . . Have a great weekend!

  • I like the way you think 🙂

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts and anti one uppery strategies as well 🙂

  • I won’t watch Spinal Tap with Deepak anymore. He gets way too argumentative every time that scene with the amp that goes to 11 plays.

    Thanks Betsy . . . You rock! 

  • Daniel . . . Your knowledge of the Deepakinator is impressive.

    Thank you and a good weekend to you my friend!

Previous post:

Next post: