It all begins with a dream!
Every now and again, time stands still for a brief moment, as if in complete acknowledgment of something profound. The inexplicable beauty of the moment lends itself to emotion. Alright, you got me, that sounds a hell of a lot better than “In December 2006 we went to Disney World”. I mean way to foul up the opening paragraph of my blog!
Any who, our journey began out of optimism, the sort of stuff that half full glasses are made of! I remember having this giant pretzel container from Price Club and starting our Disney fund. At first I dropped in my pocket change, then a few dollars here and there. In retrospect, the fund never had a chance because it was right around that time that our business failed leaving us $60,000 in debt.
As I watched my kids get older by the second, I grew rather depressed and thought my dream would never happen. Worse yet, I began to convince myself that I wasn’t worthy and deserving. Been there?
It was right about that time that I happened across a quote from Tony Robbins “If you have a strong enough ‘Why’, you’ll find the ‘How’” So I began to imagine my family having this awesome time at Disney. I could see the smiles, smell the popcorn, hear my kids laughing. I can’t tell you how many mental trips I made through those gates, but if Disney is ever allowed to charge me for them . . . I’m screwed!
I clipped a picture of the Magic Kingdom and kept it on my desk. It was the first thing I looked at when I woke up each day. Whenever I’d hit a speed bump, I’d look at that picture. When I cold called and was rejected, I looked at the picture. Whenever I’d score a win, I’d look at that picture. Somehow, having purpose (“Why”) my progress began to fast forward. I actually began to believe that I was worthy of such a goal and harnessed my inner whupass!
11 years later, the Castain family went through the gates in real time, stayed 10 days, took the Disney cruise and paid cash.
The day I realized anything is possible!
It was right about that time that I made a modification to my sales training methodology and that was the inclusion of what some call “Why Factors”
“Why Factors” are things that you want in your life as a result of your hard work in your career. It can be that dream vacation, paying off debt, a house. It can also be things like date nights with your spouse, money to give away to your favorite charity etc.
The Key is that you create some sort of collage of the things that are most important to you. Have that bad boy front, center, and in your face 24/7! Consider adding your number one “Why Factor” as a screen saver. Let your “Why’s” be the first thing you see in the morning. Mentally put yourself in the picture. Use all of your senses and sprinkle some belief in while you’re at it. Oh, and when it looks like the world is extending a hardy middle finger in your direction, look at your “Why’s” and try this cool new mental outfit on for size. It’s called “There is a way, I just haven’t found it yet” and perhaps I could interest you in trying this one on too “God’s delays, aren’t God’s denials”
Or, for the Rocky fans . . . “Get up you son of a bitch!”
This "Why" scares me because it reminds me of a wedding I will pay for one day!
Make sure you diversify your dreams! You need some inexpensive items, some middle of the road and some that are just freakin HUGE! I believe it was the great Denis Waitley who once said “We need to have a goal that’s just out of reach, but not out of sight!”
That’s how we grow and how we find the “How”! That’s how we find ourselves in the process.
And when you acquire your “Why’s” (and you will) you must pause at some point to pat yourself on the back, acknowledge the win and savor the moment!
By the way . . .
I still keep pictures of the things from my “Why” list that have been accomplished. I do that for two reasons:
- John C. Maxwell once said “To make a memory and visit it often” I won’t lie to you folks. I never busted my rear end to bring my family there once. We’ve had many a “do you remember” conversation on that subject (complete with smiles, laughs and some pride from yours truly)
- It’s an insurance policy for me for when that bum called “doubt” invites himself over.
Today’s message is simple . . . create your “Why’s”, get them front and center and just for the heck of it . . . know that you weren’t put on this earth for mediocrity!
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Once again, you hit a home run – I spent the last hour putting together 2 collages – “my Why’s”
Thanks once again
Peter
Well said, Paul. Maybe it’s the new mom in me, but this story really hit home for me. A perfect example of why it’s important to stay in front of people all the time – you never know when your message will have the perfect timing.
Paul
I’m reminded of the movies where a fighter pilot is heading for a huge dogfight in the sky. He checks his wings and then looks to his gauges and there among the dials he stops to cherish a taped up photo of the ones he loves – the why factor that gives him the courage to go kick some what.
There’s a lot of pain and disappointment that goes with the business world too and it can get very discouraging. Thanks for this reminder to reflect often on why we do what we do. It makes the valleys of life so much easier when we live from the mountaintops.
Don F Perkins
Hey Paul,
This is just what I needed to hear today! I still have my “Why Factors” hanging in front of me as I speak. I had a harsh reality hit me yesterday that was not a dissapointment but a sign that Rome wasnt built in a day! Come see us in Nashville!
Paul,
I’m fairly new to Linked in, still kind of getting my feet wet so I’m not one for commenting on much. This post really spoke to me as I just put together my ‘why’ collage last month, and I add to it regularly. Until I did this I didn’t really believe it could work the way I was assured it would. I am proud to say I am more on purpose because my why’s are in front of me every day.
Thank you for sharing this post. I know I am only one of very many who will benefit from it!
Joanne
Paul, your stories and successes beyond challenges are SO inspiring!
Thank you for sharing them. You are the King of Rock Stars!
Optimistically ~
Neil Wood
@Peter Lopez: Very cool! It will make a big deal and add more purpose and incentive to all you do! Nice job!
@ Laura Klebek: I didn’t look at it that way until you pointed it out. Thank you!
@ Don Perkins: What a great reminder. I forgot about the image of the fighter pilot. Maybe we should all do the same before we go off to battle each day!
@ Ryan Surrat: You touched on something so critical to this process . . . Patience. Boy have I had my challenges with embracing that one. I think the key is remember not to give up on the “Why”, we’re always much closer than we think. Even if its just closer to an idea that will move us closer, we’re closer and can’t ever forget that!
@ Joanne Hinks: Thank you for sharing that Joanne. That sense of purpose serves as the necessary body armor. I seem to recall nations being formed, landing on the moon, cures for diseases etc as a result of that crazy thing called purpose.
@ Neil Wood: Well I know firsthand from our many discussions that you have many “Why’s”. They drive us and help us greet each new day with the expectation that we 1 step closer. If we don’t have that, we are trying to arrive at a destination with an empty tank of gas!
Thank you all for stopping by to contribute and sharing your kind words!
Respectfully,
Paul Castain
Paul,
This expression of future vision is what gets people through some of the most difficult of circumstances in life. My wife actually made a collage of her why’s and had it printed on a 4×6 photo and has it framed on her desk.
These lessons should be shared with our kids and not just talked about among adults. I’m working on a powerpoint collage set to music. When my daughter gets a little bit older, I will put her through the same exercise.
Thanks so much for creating one of the best communities on Linkedin. You are truly an inspiration!
Paul,
Great message my man! Whether it’s a Mind Movie, a Vision Board or your computer’s Wall Paper it what get’s you to believe you will make it happen. Add to that, gratitude for all you have today and it will steer you ship in the right direction!
Thanks Again!
Larry