You’re Allowed To Walk Away You Know!

by Paul Castain on November 20, 2010

One of the local kids in my neighborhood found himself in a very dangerous situation. He was hanging out with some of his friends when a group of 30 kids from the next town over decided to give them a hard time.

One of them did so by way of punching him in the face and he then had a snap decision to make. Would he let his temper, pride and reflexes take over?

He walked away instead!

The obvious benefit is that he avoided a no win situation and got home safely.

I had a heart to heart with him and suggested that walking away is always an option (not just when you are out numbered)

Unfortunately, I don’t offer that advice as someone who is wise, I offer it as the person who liked a good brawl and enjoyed standing up for myself. Not in a physical sense (sort of :) ) but in the form of protecting my opinions, my values, and simply because I don’t have patience for bullies of any sort.

5 years ago I made a conscious decision to exercise my right to walk away.

Why?

1)    You can’t change “stupid”. Good luck with that one.

2)    I don’t like the loss of control when my ego takes me on auto pilot

3)    It’s a tremendous waste of energy

And for those of you who are concerned with your personal brand, it distracts from “your main thing”

So the next time you have that urge to set someone straight, right the wrong, even the score or simply tell someone to piss off . . .

Walk away knowing you did something that demonstrated a very high level of control.

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  • http://blog.esimplestudios.com Gabriele Maidecchi

    I have a good self-control, but it’s my special version of it. Usually if there’s the need to treat someone badly, I don’t walk away, I just treat him badly with self-control. Does it even make sense? I hope it does, works for me though ;)

  • Chuck Ferguson

    This is the kind of “Jedi Leadship” the world needs more of.

    You can’t change minds by beating people up. Only through your good example will others see the right way and follow on their own.

    Congratulations on your choice and on the chance you take by exposing your inner self to others.

    –Chuck

  • http://www.zacares.com Juan

    Hi Paul,
    This is a good lesson I should learn from.
    Thank you for offering us this point of view which makes much more sense than the “beating” one.
    With respect,
    Juan

  • Sheila

    I’m not a fan of physical violence (although there have been a few people in my time that I’d like to kick the shit out of). I’ve always been taught and teach my kids as well that not saying “anything” is giving that person permission to continue being an ass or bully, hurting your feelings again or whatever the situation. If you notice, today’s society is using stupidity more and more as an excuse and many benefit from it. It works for them…Keep in mind there is a way to say things with tack and then again, we are all adults in the workplace and need to be reminded that this is not the playground regardless of how cool or important you “think” you are.
    I believe part of society’s problems today stem from being overly politically correct and being expected to always have a polyanna attitude. You cannot speak your mind, or share what you’re “really” feeling otherwise the PC police will be all over you. The problem with that is you really don’t know where anyone “truly” stands.
    Thanks for letting me speak my mind here.

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